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My beloved Macbeth,

I can barely write as unrighteous tears cloud my eyes and blur my vision.
Oh, my love, how I have battled
with my conscience and how my words 'our deeds must not be thought of ' come
back to haunt me. Screams in my
head paralyse my sleep and torture my wake. I can no longer live for fear of
the truth being shared.
Ever since I received that fateful letter I began plotting how we could
speed our path to power .I should
have let fate take its course instead of trying to take fate into my own
hands. If I had done that then maybe the smell
of Duncan's blood would disappear and perhaps I would not be writing this,
my final letter.
I remember the time when we were a young happy couple, so much in love, so
much to live for. How long
ago this all seems now. I wish we could return to that happiness, but it is
all too late. I have ruined everything you
worked so hard for.
You were a role model to everyone who knew you. Well respected, brave and
loyal, you served your
country and gained the trust of our king. He rewarded you well and would
have rewarded you further, but now I ve
estroyed everything. I am filled with pain and anguish and hopeless despair
and all I can offer you is that when I
am gone it may relieve some of the guilt I have put upon your soul.
I recall being overcome with emotion when you returned to me after the
battle and you were given
the title Thane of Cawdor. I was filled with joy in seeing you and
anticipation of what the future would hold. After
speaking with you about your meeting with the witches and the prophecies
they foretold, impatience gripped my
spirit and my uncompromising desire for you to ascend the throne forced me
to plot and plan our next moves to
power.
I planned we would take Duncan's life that night, when he was invited to
or banquet, but I did not have the
power to continue so I had to call on the evil spirits to possess my body
and help remove all trace of weakness and
compassion. I wanted power more than anything and there seemed to be nothing
that could stand in my way.
Oh, how I wish I had listened when you said you had changed your mind
about killing Duncan, but the
spirits drove me into persuading you to carry out the awful deed. After you
had killed Duncan you seemed afraid of
your acts of betrayal towards your king but I was so selfish I only ever
thought of the power I would gain when you
were king. I told you not to think of our deeds and when you showed me the
blood on your hands I calmly said that
'a little water will wash away our deeds '.
When the others found out about Duncan's death I was shocked at the way you
killed Duncan's men and
although most people thought you were just being loyal to your king I feel
sure some people realised the truth.
My heart aches as I remember our Coronation banquet. It should have been
such a happy event - our
crowning glory. But instead it was filled uncertainty and anguish. When you
stood to praise absent Banquo's good
name your sudden insane actions and words, as though you had seen a ghost,
sent terror through me, and though I
managed to prevent you revealing your guilt to everyone, the night was
destroyed and I later began to wonder just
what we had accomplished in our deeds.
I was hurt, my love, when I discovered you had arranged for the murder of
Banquo and Fleance. You had
always told me everything, every plan, every hope, every desire, I remember
your words, 'my dearest partner of
greatness'. But suddenly things had changed. Our lack of communication made
me feel isolated and alone.
I grieved, my dearest husband, when I learnt about the death of Lady Mac
Duff and her children. Did these
poor souls innocent of all crimes have to die? To what depths have our
initial deeds led us?
Treachery, misery, violence and insanity are the crimes we committed.
Climbing through the wreckage of
my twisted decisions I realise that together we barred reality and lived
blindly. Once our fellow countymen break
through the wall of lies, rage will be unstoppable. All this I cannot bear
to witness. So this, my final deed, will spare
me from a world I cannot face.
All praise to you, the conscious one, who is left to suffer the wound. My
heart is with you always,

Your eternal love.

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